A Mother and Son
by Komaki Nakao
Summary: Lily finds a confidant in the most unexpected place; the nursery.


Lily Potter slowly yanked herself out of the wonderful abyss of sleep, happy to leave the world of her nightmares behind. For a few moments, she swore she could see the face of Bellatrix Lestrange – whom she had been dueling in the realm of dreams – dancing around in the shadows of her bedroom. Lily gripped the sheets tightly between her fingers until the face vanished, leaving behind only vague outlines of walls and furniture.

And the sound of a baby crying.

"Lil, do you think you could get him this time?" the lump next to her grumbled, rolling over under the thick, warm comforter.

"Sure, love," Lily mumbled, slowly sitting up in bed. She smiled fondly at the figure of her husband, James Potter, stretched out next to her. Though only his wild tuff of black hair stuck out from under the blankets, she could clearly picture his slender yet muscular frame; after several years of marriage, she knew his body almost as well as she knew her own.

Lily slid out of bed, feeling a shiver run up her spine as her feet touched the cold wooden floors. Her feet fished around in the dark for her slippers, only able to find one before her son let out another shrill cry for attention. She sighed, departing from her bedroom with one slippered foot and a long, well-deserved yawn.

_He hasn't slept through the night yet,_ she thought as she stumbled down the hallway. _If the Death Eaters don't kill me, eighteen years of this probably will._

The nursery was small, but comfortable. In her mind, Lily could vividly remember the redecoration process; she could almost see Sirius, Peter, and Remus standing in the middle of the room, getting more pale blue paint on themselves than on the walls. She could remember every word of the argument she had with Sirius about which way the wallpaper-trim was supposed to hang (Sirius had hung it his way behind her back, only to find that it was, in fact, upside-down). James was supposed to have cleaned it up before going to bed, which meant that dozens of baby toys were strung out across the floor. Lily nearly stepped on a toy car as she crossed over to the cradle.

She looked down at her son, whose chubby limbs were flailing about wildly as he sobbed. Despite how horrid the sound was, Lily could help but smile at her child. Harry seemed to be a ball of boundless energy, filling the happy young couple with wonder every time they laid eyes on him. Every day was an adventure.

"Shhh, calm down," Lily whispered, lifting little Harry out of his crib. The crying stopped almost instantly.

_That was easier than I thought,_ Lily said to herself, slowly lowering the baby back into his bed. However, the second his head touched the miniature mattress, he burst into tears once more.

"I should have figured as much," Lily sighed, pulling Harry back up into her arms. "How about I sit with you until you fall asleep? Would you like that?"

Of course, he gave no verbal answer, but the way he nuzzled his soft face against her shoulder suggested that it was exactly what he wanted.

"You're just like your father," Lily said, kissing the top of his head – which sported a mop of black hair similar to her husband's – as she sat down in her rocking chair. "You'll do anything for attention."

Harry didn't argue as he looked up at Lily with his tiny green eyes. Lily was glad that he had inherited at least one of her traits; those eyes were like a gift that only she could have given him.

"Oh Harry," she sighed, holding out her pinky for him to grab onto. Harry accepted the offer, wrapping his entire hand around the tiny digit. "Things are getting so complicated; sometimes I feel like you're the only thing in my life that makes sense anymore."

Harry mumbled an answer, as if to suggest he was there to listen to whatever his mother had to say.

"You-Know-Who keeps gaining more and more influence," Lily explained to her baby. "People I've known for ages are starting to go over to his side. Sirius seems to think that he's even controlling the Minister of Magic, but you know how paranoid he can be…"

Harry pulled Lily's finger into his tiny mouth, gnawing on it with his gums. The sensation made Lily chuckle, despite the dark topic they were discussing.

"I'm really starting to get scared," she whispered. It was something she hadn't told anyone; not even James. "I feel like I can't trust anyone anymore. You remember Remus Lupin, don't you, Harry? You know, the nice man who gave you that teddy bear you love so much…" Lily swallowed her tears, hardly able to believe the words that were about to come out of her mouth. "J-james and Sirius seem to think he's spying for You-Know-Who. Can you believe that? Remus, of all people…

"Dumbledore came to visit us today," Lily continued somberly. "While you were napping. He seems to think it would be a good idea if we went into hiding. Tomorrow Sirius and Peter are coming over, and we're going to discuss the plan in further detail. I wanted to invite Remus, but… James doesn't think that would be such a good idea. But I can't stand the thought of hiding this from him; he's been our friend for so long… Remus Lupin, a spy! Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard?"

She sighed, "But James and Sirius wouldn't just accuse him without reason, either… Oh, this is such a mess! Sometimes I wish I could just close my eyes and wait for this whole thing to be over."

Harry hiccupped, pulling Lily out of her trance. She stared at her child, unable to keep herself from grinning. How could someone look at Harry and _not_ smile?

_This is what makes all the trouble worthwhile,_ she thought, pulling her finger out of his mouth so she could caress his tiny face. _If we can't make the world a better place for the next generation, we've failed as adults, haven't we?_

Lily laughed, "Why am I telling _you_ all this? You're just a baby; you don't understand a word I'm saying."


End file.
